Making disciples is not controversial or complicated, but most of us have never really been taught how to make one or how to be made into one. That’s why I created 40, a resource designed to guide believers along the discipleship journey. It has everything you need to disciple another believer for a year - with subjects to discuss, lessons to learn, Scripture to study, and questions to ask. But whether you use 40 or not, the question remains:
How do you know who to invite into a discipleship relationship?
My mentor shared a very helpful acronym with me that was most likely not original to him, and he gave me permission to use it as I wished. I find it very helpful when beginning to analyze who in my life is ready to be discipled. When prayerfully choosing this person, you, me, any and all of us, need to find someone to disciple who has the right H.E.A.R.T. Let me explain what each letter stands for and how you can apply it to your decision.
1: You need to find someone who is hungry.
The H in H.E.A.R.T. stands for hungry. To successfully disciple someone, the person you choose to disciple must truly hunger to be discipled. Spiritual hunger comes from a place of deep desire coupled with the realization that only growth in Christ can satisfy. They have to thirst for God and His movement in their life.
How can you identify someone who is truly hungry for discipleship? You can start simply by praying, “Lord, I’m willing to do this, but I want to choose and invite the right person according to Your will. Show me who’s in need of discipleship and who also has the hunger to grow.”
Second, look around with spiritual eyes. Who has recently come to faith in Christ? Who is hurting? Who is navigating major life changes? Who has been coasting but now God has their attention? Who is talking about the power of Jesus?
Finally, ask spiritually mature people. Your pastor or someone who has mentored you may know of a person hungry for more growth and in need of a mentor.
2: You need to find someone who is engaged.
The E in H.E.A.R.T. stands for engaged. Making a year-long commitment to meet with someone in a committed discipleship relationship is not easy, nor is it for those far from the body of Christ. I am not in a position to say that someone totally disconnected from church who shows little to no sign of spiritual vitality can’t suddenly repent and agree to be discipled intensely for one year. I just have never seen it.
It has been my observation that the best people to approach about being discipled are already engaged in a lesser way in their faith community. Maybe they only serve with the kids’ ministry, or they just joined a small group, or they love to help with the parking team, or they have been on a mission trip in the past. There is an army of precious people who love the Lord, serve the church, yet have never been truly discipled. These are the folks who are already engaged or have been engaged in the past. Their connection to the church shows some level of faith (though it might not be saving faith).
3: You need to find someone who is available.
The A in H.E.A.R.T. stands for available. Most professing Christians find it difficult to turn down a sincere invitation to join a Bible study. And while Bible studies can be immensely rewarding and edifying, the term has come to mean an event where people gather under a teacher on a weekly basis for eight to thirteen weeks. Discipling someone for a year is not a Bible study. If a Bible study is a leisurely stroll through a small town, discipleship is like running the Boston Marathon. It takes time, effort, and tenacity.
So remember, as you prayerfully seek the person you will disciple, you are not inviting them to a Bible study. That terminology is not fair to them or you. What is fair is for you to be honest and explain what this relationship involves. If you are walking through the resource I created, it will be a 40-week journey with five daily devotionals for each individual to do on their own time, followed by discussion questions for your weekly meeting with your discipleship partner. (Forty weeks in a 52-week year gives plenty of margin for stuff to go wrong–sickness, travel, holidays, and family needs all happen.) You are looking for someone who has both the time and the desire to make this kind of commitment.
4: You need to find someone who is reliable.
The R in H.E.A.R.T. stands for reliable. Before I became a pastor, I wanted to be a football coach. The Lord had other plans, but He did allow me to coach one year of high school football before attending seminary, and I thoroughly enjoyed it. Every coach, no matter the sport, knows how important practice is. While encouraging my players (here, encouraging usually meant yelling), I would reiterate that when they missed a practice, they actually missed two. My player missed a day to get better, and his opponent at the next school we played got a day’s worth of preparation ahead of my player. My player might make up a practice, but he could never change the fact that his opponent got a day better.
In many ways, discipleship is no different. Our opponent, Satan, never takes a day off, ever. Therefore, if we are serious about growing, we have to be reliable. We have to do our daily devotions, spend time in prayer, CAMP in the Word, and make our weekly meetings. We have to do the work to see God yield the fruit.
As you prayerfully seek to pour your life into a person through discipleship, you need to gauge their reliability. Will they follow through? I realize this can be tricky. Some folks bleed reliability. They are known for stepping up, speaking up, signing up, and showing up. Others may be harder to read. But week in and week out, they must understand that reliability is key.
5: You need to find someone who is teachable.
The T in H.E.A.R.T. stands for teachable.
Being teachable is the outward posture of an inwardly humble person. Humility bubbles up in teachability. When a person is humble and teachable, two realities come to fruition in their life: they know they need knowledge, and they know that they cannot attain it on their own.
Questions to consider as you gauge whether or not a person is teachable:
- Are they learning now? In other words, do they show some affinity toward listening to the pastor preach, attending a small group Bible study, or even reading a book about the faith?
- Do they ask questions? Teachable people don’t have to be outspoken people, but they do tend to be inquisitive about the things of God.
- Humility (the inward posture of teachability) is hard to describe but easy to detect. Do you sense humility in their life? Do others sense it who might know them better than you?
As we look for people with hearts that can be discipled, I pray we ourselves will remain people who can be described in this way. People who are hungry, engaged, available, reliable, and teachable.
(Are you looking for a tool you can use to actually disciple another person? 40 is a one-of-a-kind resource that can be used for approximately one year of intentional discipleship between believers. With daily devotionals, personal reflection and discussion questions, and Scripture to study using the CAMP Method created by D.J., this resource will help you become a more devoted disciple of Jesus and a disciple maker for Jesus. You can purchase 40 in either book form, or it’s now available as an app! Find out more HERE.)